Find Me
by Pinguicha
Summary: After the Synthesis, Kaidan finally found Shepard. However, the god-child has erased most of her memories. Deep down, he still has to find her and help her remember. And he will. No matter what.
1. Dreams

**Find Me**

_Prologue: Dreams_

Life was unlike anything they remembered. They were not organics but they were not synthetics either… They were both and, for some reason, Kaidan saw all of it as a gift… and as a curse.

Remembering Joker and EDI, how they'd stood together after the battle, Kaidan couldn't help but to think whatever had happened in the Citadel had been the best possible outcome. Joker was his friend, but he had been unable to fully live his life up until now. Now that he was partly synthetic, Vrolik's syndrome no longer was a burden to him. People who had been sick… to those, whatever their new life was, it was a gift… Shepard's gift.

Shepard… Just thinking about her weighted on Kaidan's heart. He had no idea what had happened on the Citadel, but one thing had been clear: Shepard had not made it out alive. They had scoured the rubble, searched every single place, but her body had just not been there. They'd found Anderson and the Illusive Man, both dead, and countless other bodies… But not Shepard's.

Shepard… Kaidan tried hard not to think about her again, but as it was usual, he failed. He remembered how soft and silky her dark brown hair had been as he tucked a lock behind her ear; he remembered how her warm lips had felt against his and how she'd kiss him as though there was nothing else in the universe except for them. Shepard had always had this way, this… exquisite manner that had made him feel as though he had been on top of the world so as long as he'd been with her.

Kaidan tilted his head up, trying to make the tears that threatened to fall from his eyes disappear. Shepard was gone. He would never look at her dark blue eyes again, nor melt under her smile, nor smell the rosemary in her hair, nor feel her sweet, tempting touch on his skin again.

It hadn't been long since she'd vanished, but Kaidan missed Shepard desperately already – a feeling he knew would only worsen with time.

And then, there were those dreams…

They had started a couple of weeks after the fight with the Reapers had been over with. He would be in this dark forest where he'd wander for hours. He'd see her across the distance and he would run to her, but he had never managed to get close enough to touch her. Shepard's lips would move, but no sound would come out of them and she'd disappear into the flames and Kaidan would wake up, all sweat and tears. He would search for her on the bed, but she was gone.

_Gone_. Shepard was gone.

It was a knife driven through his heart all over again and he found it difficult to breathe. The pain didn't get easier. After all, how could you ever recover from the loss of the love of your life? You didn't. You just… learned to live with it.

Living with it… it was the hardest thing Kaidan had ever had to do.

He looked down at his datapad. There were innumerous unread messages from Hackett, from the Council… and from Liara. Frowning, Kaidan opened the one sent by the asari. He had told her about the dreams, hoping it would ease his mind and make those dreams stop. They hadn't, but talking to Liara about those things had relieved him somehow.

_Kaidan_, the message read. _I wish I had more comforting words to you, but recurring dreams are a normal thing when you're grieving. Shepard was something else, something entirely out of this universe. She was the kind of person who is born only once in a millennia and because she was such a great part of our lives, the hole she left behind was equally big._

_I find myself remembering her a lot. The friendship we shared was special and Shepard was a friend like no other. Through thick and thin, she'd have your back, no matter what. I know she certainly had mine._

_I hate to say this to you, Kaidan, but there is little hope she's alive. Our new form, this… mixture between synthetic and organic, I believe it was her final gift to us – to the entire universe. I believe she sacrificed herself to see that the cycle was never repeated – and, in return, made us all so much more than we originally were._

_I know you miss her terribly. I do too, though perhaps not in the same way you do. And know that even though I have little hope, it's not as though as I have none. If there's even the smallest chance Shepard's alive, I'd turn the whole universe upside down just to find her. As I know you would._

_Please keep in touch._

_Your friend,_

_Liara_

Kaidan closed his eyes and inhaled deeply. Liara, too, had little hope, but she had _some_, however small a fragment it might be.

Hope… Shepard had always had it and for her, Kaidan would have it too.

Kaidan set down his datapad, his lids suddenly heavy. He felt a migraine coming up and once more, he hurt just from remembering how Shepard would always help him through those. She'd lie beside him and would tangle her fingers in his hair. She would kiss his forehead, then the tip of his nose, then his lips… Those dark blue eyes would stare into his and Kaidan would get lost in them.

He wished he could get lost in those eyes, so dark a blue they seemed black, right now.

Kaidan moved to the makeshift bed he had been assigned in one of the few buildings that were still intact in London. Outside, the noises of reconstruction could be heard through the entire night, but he had learned how to live with them.

He sat on the bed and rubbed his eyes. How long had it been since he'd last slept? Twenty-four hours? More? It certainly felt as though he'd been awake for more than a day. Not even bothering to take off his clothes, Kaidan fell back on the bed and covered himself with the thin sheet he'd been provided.

As soon as he closed his eyes, he was back in that dark forest. As usual, he wandered through its somber corners. Kaidan knew he was asleep – he had had this dream so often it was impossible not to know he was dreaming, - and he could control a measure of his dream. He could control enough of it to know he wanted to find Shepard.

He saw a column of light and, as usual, Shepard was standing stark-naked under it. However, unlike in previous dreams, Kaidan could see tubes going into her arms, connecting her to some sort of machine high up in the air.

She looked… tired and wan, but he could tell she was fighting, she was…

He stepped closer and Shepard's lips moved. Kaidan expected no sound to come out of them, but this time around… He heard her voice. Her sweet, deep, beautiful voice, shaping up words and, for the first time, he managed to hear what she had been saying.

"_Find me_," Shepard said. "_Please find me._"

Suddenly, Kaidan's eyes shot open. His heart was racing and his breathing was shallow, desperate.

"_Find me," _she had said. All along, the Shepard in his dreams had tried to tell him to find her… She'd been trying for so long that she exhausted herself and only now, after all this time, did Kaidan manage to hear it.

Shepard had told him of dreams that had plagued her ever since Earth had been attacked. Dreams in a dark forest, where she searched for a child she had seen die. She told him she had heard Ash, Legion, Mordin, lots of people in those dreams and that one voice had begged her to wake up. Shepard had thought those were no common dreams and this… There was no way this was a common dream either.

A beacon of hope lighted his chest.

Somewhere out there, Shepard was alive… And he was going to find her.


	2. I: Hope

A/N: I am a hopeless romantic. Let this fanfic be a testament to that.

* * *

><p><em>I: Hope<em>

Kaidan was no longer in the forest. He wandered in a road, framed by a variety of plants. "_Find me,_" Shepard's voice rung in his ears. It was coming from beyond the road, from within the dense vegetation.

"Shepard!" Kaidan screamed as he tried to break through the barrier that was the twisting branches and lianas of several trees. "_Shepard_!"

"_Find me!"_

That last, desperate cry was the last thing Kaidan heard before waking up.

* * *

><p>With the destruction of the Mass Relays, cross-galactic transportation was slow and consuming. At first, no one could travel between the stars and there were a great deal of people stranded on Earth. Luckily, some of the most brilliant minds in the galaxy were there and months later, the first Mass Relay substitute went live. Albeit travel was slow, it was better than nothing.<p>

Liara, who had been on Thessia a few weeks ago, set foot on Earth; she had come to talk face-to-face with Kaidan. Shepard's apparent death had been hard on everyone, but it had particularly – and unsurprisingly, - affected Kaidan the most.

The talk of seeing Shepard in his dreams… telling her that at first, Shepard's mouth had only moved, but Kaidan had told the asari that as of late, she had been telling him to find her and… It had caused Liara to worry even more about her friend.

She came to a halt when she noticed that there was a very young human woman in the spaceport, looking at her with shiny eyes. Everyone had eyes like that now, beautiful, exquisite eyes. Liara couldn't help remembering Shepard then; Shepard had had the most intriguing eyes of the darkest blue Liara had ever seen. If she were here… Liara took a hand to her temples. If Shepard were here, she certainly would have had the most mesmerizing Synthesis eyes.

Liara's hand fell and the woman approached her.

"Doctor T'Soni," she greeted. "I'm Ensign Martin. I'm here to escort you and help you get settled."

The asari arched a brow. "I'm here to visit a friend, Ensign. Why would the Alliance send you to help me get settled?"

"The Alliance only knew that you were coming, not why," explained Martin. "But we are in great need of your expertise, as some believe we have inherited certain traits from the protheans. We thought… maybe you could help us figure things out."

It made sense that they were doing the bulk of the research on Earth – after all, most alien fleets were still stationed here, - and she wanted to help, but… "Why am I only hearing about this now?"

"Because we only found out about the prothean traits two days ago," said the Ensign. "With the delay in communications, we couldn't formally ask you before you arrived." Her eyes widened and she shifted in her position. "You… don't want to help?"

"No, I do, but…" Liara sighed. "I need to see Major Alenko first."

"I can take you to him once you drop off your things in your quarters," Martin offered.

"That would be great, thank you," said the asari.

After leaving her bags in a reconstructed apartment, the Ensign took Liara to where Kaidan was. It was an office in an old building which had been mostly reconstructed. Liara went in, alone, while the Ensign waited at the door. Kaidan was by himself, reading a datapad which Liara assumed to have something to do with overseeing the rebuilding of this place hospital. He was thin, thinner than she remembered, and had heavy shadows under his eyes. In humans, that meant they hadn't slept properly and it worried Liara even more. Kaidan had not been sleeping and he had clearly not been eating either. Shepard's death was wasting him away.

Kaidan lifted his eyes and his lips parte into the saddest smile Liara had ever seen. She approached him and gave him a quick hug. "Kaidan," Liara said. "It's good to see you."

"You too, Liara," he said. She couldn't help but notice how weak and worn his voice was. "Hackett talked about bringing you over to help with the studies, but I never figured you'd leave Thessia."

The asari looked away for a moment. When she met Kaidan's eyes again, she bit down her lip. "I came to see you, actually. I… was worried." Kaidan pursed his lips. Sighing, Liara decided to change the subject. Best not talk about this here anyway. "Why would they need a Major coordinating this?" asked the asari.

Kaidan snorted. "Rise in crime."

Liara's eyes widened. "Really?" Thessia had seen war as well, but the asari rebuilding hadn't turned to a less honest living. That they had on Earth… it was sad; sad and revolting.

"Human nature's a fucked up thing," said Kaidan, a hint of anger dripping from his voice.

Shepard used to say that, Liara recalled, but she wasn't going to bring that up. Not now. "When are you free? We need to talk, Kaidan."

He closed his eyes and in his features Liara saw the utmost suffering. "I know, I…" His hands dropped to his sides. "I'm leaving in ten minutes. We can talk at my place."

Liara nodded. "I'll wait for you, then."

"Yeah. Take a seat." He gestured towards an empty chair. "I'll be back soon."

The asari sat down. As Kaidan disappeared from her view, she couldn't help but notice how heavy his steps were and how his shoulders seemed to sag. This really wasn't being easy on him, she thought, and he still managed to work. Maybe it was his only distraction.

It didn't take long for Kaidan to come back. "Come. We can talk in my quarters."

He led her to another building, not very far from where they were. Inside, it was composed of several rooms which had clearly been quickly put together. The one they had assigned to Kaidan was small, with only a bed, a chair and a desk.

Kaidan looked at her and Liara knew it was time to talk. "I know this is a stupid question, but…" Liara tried to keep her tone as even as she could. "How are you holding up?"

The human biotic sat on the bed and ran his hands over his face. "Not… not very well. But you can see that, can't you?"

"Yes," Liara whispered. "And those dreams? Are you still having them?"

Slowly, Kaidan nodded. "They've changed, though. The place has changed to one that's full of plants and I hear Shepard calling me from very far away, but whenever I try following the sound of her voice, I get lost." He swallowed dryly. "It would have been one thing if we had found her body, but this…? These dreams, this haunting, this constant hope…" He apologetically looked at Liara. "How can I deal with that?"

Liara looked to the side. "Everything she went through to see the war against the Reapers to an end, only to vanish… It's cruel. And now the whole galaxy is being rebuilt… It's just not the same without her. It feels unfinished." confessed Liara.

All of a sudden, Kaidan got up. He grabbed Liara's arms with an almost violent desperation and shook her. "That is why I _know_ she's alive, Liara. I…" He looked at his hands and, realizing how strongly he had been holding the asari, he shook his head and dropped them. "I know she is. I just don't know where."

"I can… look into your memories, as I once did Shepard's," Liara offered. "To see if I recognize the place."

Normally, one would think heavily before opening his mind to someone else. However, Kaidan was so desperate and his trust in Liara was so great that it didn't even take him a second to say "Do it."

Liara got to her feet and put her blue hands on the sides of Kaidan's head. Kaidan drew in a shaky breath, remembering when Liara had done this with Shepard and how he had felt jealous of the connection they had shared. He could see it, as clear as day that they had forged a bond that would last a lifetime. He had never thought he would be in Shepard's place, ready to open his mind to Liara. But he had to find Shepard and Liara was his friend. He could do this.

Liara's eyes became black and Kaidan felt her presence in his mind. He closed his eyes and allowed her to see into his dreams. There was the road, the plants and Shepard's voice, desperately telling him to find her. Then, it was over.

Liara's hands dropped to her sides and she took a hand to her lips.

"The place you see her in…" Liara closed her eyes and inhaled deeply. "I think I know it."

Kaidan's eyes shone with hope. "You do?"

"Yes." Liara nodded. "Kaidan… it's Eden Prime. When Shepard freed Javik, I was there. That place… One of the roads we saw while on the shuttle is exactly like the one in your dreams."

"If we're to go, we need Tali and Garrus," Liara stated. "Tali can hack into practically anything and Garrus is the best shooter I've seen since-" she bit down her lip before she could say Shepard's name, but it was to no avail. Kaidan's face became shadowed again. He looked out the window and Liara could literally feel the pain in his voice when he spoke.

"She… was a really good shot, wasn't she?" he meekly said.

Liara remembered the first time she'd seen Shepard shoot. She had just rescued her from Therum and a krogan had been waiting for them. Shepard didn't even flinch; she just readied her sniper rifle and shot the krogan's head once, twice and finally, three times before the weapon overheated. She had been precise, cool and had exuded an air of danger about her.

"The very best," Liara whispered. She then decided to go back to their plan. "We also need a means to get there. Can you… well, get the Normandy?"

Kaidan frowned in deep thought. "I don't know. Maybe if I talk to Hackett…"

"Wasn't his daughter Shepard's friend?" asked Liara.

"Yeah, Maria…" Kaidan bit down his lip. "I haven't seen her in a while, but I believe she's in one of the teams studying our new half-synthetic, half-organic bodies." Shepard hadn't had many friends back when she'd been training at the military academy. She had told Kaidan Maria had been one of the few people who had befriended her – just as she was one of the few people who called Shepard by her first name.

"Will she help us?" asked Liara.

"She might."

"She's probably our best bet to get some means of transportation," Liara said. Kaidan had to give it to Liara: she was calm, analyzing the situation carefully, while he was a nervous mess.

"Then you go to her first. With her on our side, we have a bigger chance of getting the Normandy. If she doesn't help…"

"I will steal a spaceship myself," Kaidan promptly completed. "Liara, she's alive. I know she's alive."

With a soft hand, Liara touched Kaidan's shoulder. "I know you know. But you have to realize, Kaidan, that when you tell your superiors about this, they'll think of it as a wild goose chase."

"They thought Shepard's warnings about the Reapers were a wild goose chase as well," stated Kaidan. "She proved them wrong – just as I'll prove them wrong now." He breathed in as though to steady himself. "Anyway… Do you know where Tali and Garrus are?"

"They're here, on Earth," said Liara. "In the research documents they provided me with, it stated that Tali has been helping with figuring out our synthetic half. And Garrus…" She looked at the ceiling as her voice purposefully trailed away. "Well, you can guess."

Kaidan could guess, all right. Shepard had been tired and worn out but she still had managed this smile when she had told him what she had just seen in the main battery. Shepard had been genuinely happy for Tali and Garrus – she was that kind of person, after all.

"I'll message them once I get to my room," Liara offered as she got up from the chair. "And you message Maria. I'll find you tomorrow." She stepped closer to Kaidan and touched his shoulder. "We'll find her, Kaidan."

He inclined his head. "Thank you, Liara."

The asari left then and, sitting back on his bed, Kaidan began to type a message on his omni-tool.

_Maria,_

_I know you're probably very busy with your research, but I need your help. It's about Alys. I… I think she's still alive. _

_I have been having these strange dreams for a while now. Alys was there and even though no sound escaped her lips at first, I've begun to hear her. She tells me to find her, over and over again._

_Liara has looked into my memories and she's recognized the place. It's Eden Prime. I want to go there, check it out. If Alys I there, I want to – I _have_ to, - find her. But for that, I need your help. I know it's a lot to ask, but if there's anyone who can get us transportation, it is you. _

_Please,_

_Major Kaidan Alenko_

After the message had been sent, Kaidan spent the next few hours trying to get a wink of sleep. When he finally did, he was back in that lush planet he knew now was some part of Eden Prime.

He treaded through the road, his ears already searching for Shepard's voice. He tried to get off the road, to go through the dense plant life that framed it, but he couldn't.

"_Find me,_" Shepard's voice echoed within his mind. Kaidan began to tear at the knotted lianas in front of him, trying to carve a path through the undergrowth but whenever he managed to get rid of a liana, another one would pop in its place.

"Shepard!" he called. "_Alys_! Alys, where are you?"

"_Find me_," came the desperate reply.

With a jolt, Kaidan sat up. He was in his plain room, unable to hear Shepard's voice as he had in the dream. Kaidan looked down the window. She was there in Eden Prime. He could feel it._ Find me_, she had said, her voice filled with agony and despair.

Tomorrow, Maria would have read his message and she certainly would take it to Admiral Hackett. Tomorrow, Liara was going to return with news from Garrus and Tali. Then they'd get the Normandy – or any other ship, - and they'd go to Eden Prime.

Kaidan wasn't going to give up on Shepard. Throughout the war, against impossible odds, Shepard had never lost her hope that they would all see that through. Now that she was missing, it was Kaidan's turn to keep hope's flame alive.

They were going to find her. He was certain of it.


	3. II: Pledge

_A/N: Keeping chapters short so I can update more often. Lots and lots of romance coming soon!  
><em>

* * *

><p><em>II: Pledge<em>

"I've talked to Tali and Garrus," Liara informed as she and Kaidan shared a meal of rations. Although certain parts of Earth had fresh food, the big town centers were all rubble. Whoever was stationed there was sentenced to rations, rations and more rations.

Kaidan's fork stopped halfway to his mouth. "What did they say?"

"They're coming over as soon as possible," replied the asari. "What about Maria? Have you heard from her?"

"Not yet," said Kaidan. "She's probably terribly busy right now, with all the AI and robotics work – heck maybe she's even working with Tali."

"It wouldn't surprise me if they were," Liara agreed.

"When will you be joining the research team?"

"Officially? After we find Shepard." It wasn't an "If we find Shepard". Liara was speaking with certainty that they were going to find her. Knowing Liara, too, believed Shepard was still alive… it lifted Kaidan's spirits. "Meanwhile, I've been exploring our new physiology to try and find some trace of prothean traits. So far, no signs of anything."

"Shouldn't they get a genetics expert to do that job?"

"And they have. I've spoken to Doctor Linda and she's amazing. She just didn't have any contact with any _living_ prothean… Like I had."

"Javik," Kaidan completed.

"Precisely." Liara took a sip of her water. "It would do much good if we found him, but… He's disappeared."

They ate the remaining of their meals in silence which would only be broken by Kaidan's omni-tool. Hoping it was Maria's response, he checked it immediately. His hands trembled with expectation and it became even worse when he read the sender's name.

"It's Maria," he said and proceeded to read the message aloud.

"_Kaidan_," she had written. "_I don't consider dreams proof that she's alive. However… there is much in our new bodies we don't understand yet. For all I know, Alys might indeed be alive and has somehow managed to contact you through some sort of new link in our brains. And if there's a chance she's not dead…_

"_I'll talk to my father. The Normandy has been grounded for a while due to lack of fuel, but we've begun increasing production so you should be fine on that account. _

"_Talk to you soon, Maria Hackett._"

Once he was finished, he looked at Liara expectantly. Her chin rested on her intertwined hands and there were pensive lines on her face. "Well, she's going to talk to Hackett. At least it's something." Her blue eyes looked up at her friend and she saw that he was worried. Hope was such a cruel mistress, Liara realized. So she reached out for his hand and gave it a squeeze. "We'll find her, Kaidan."

His throat too constricted for him to speak, Kaidan mustered an acknowledging nod before turning back to his food.

* * *

><p>Two days after Maria's reply – and much to Kaidan's surprise, - Tali and Garrus came to him at the hospital.<p>

"Kaidan," Garrus greeted, shaking the human's hand. "You look like hell."

The human biotic scratched the back of his head. "Feel like it, too." His eyes flitted to the quarian. "Hello, Tali."

Like Garrus, Tali shook Kaidan's hand. Ever since she had been promoted to Admiral, he had always found it curious how Tali's behavior bordered on formal most of the time… He had only seen Tali hug someone once and that someone had been Shepard.

Shepard had always had a way of worming herself into people's hearts, regardless of how guarded they were. It was her quiet steadiness, Kaidan thought, that inspired trust in people; that and her overwhelming capacity to see something through when everyone else thought it a lost cause.

Tali had been considered a lost cause, Shepard had told Kaidan, when they found geth aboard her father's ship. The quarians had wanted to exile her but Shepard, through some combination of spectacular wordplay and sheer luck, had managed to keep Tali safe and part of the Flotilla… While keeping Tali's father's meddling with the geth a secret. It had been no small feat and it had strengthened the already strong friendship between Shepard and Tali.

"Garrus is right. You _do_ look like hell," said the quarian. "Liara told us you… haven't been sleeping well. That dreams keep you awake at night."

"These are not common dreams," Kaidan objected. "There's something else to them, something that rings true."

"Something that makes you think that somewhere out there, Shepard's alive," Garrus stated. "And now you want to find her."

"Yes," he said.

Tali examined Kaidan carefully before sighing. "I don't know, Kaidan. Some people have theorized that she gave up her essence so we could become…" She gestured to her body. "This. I'm inclined to believe them – it's what makes the most sense."

"Some say the whole existence of the Reapers made no sense and yet, they exist," Kaidan pointed out. "Sometimes things don't have to make sense."

Tali sighed. "Kaidan…"

"I turned from her once, on Horizon," Kaidan's tone was now strong, resolute and he clearly wanted to crush Tali's logic. "I'm not going to do the same again."

"And you shouldn't," said Garrus, a hint of criticism on his voice. "Not then and not now."

Tali turned to the turian, riddled with disbelief. "Don't tell me you want to go."

The turian put a hand on Tali's shoulder and there was a moment of complicity that left Kaidan uneasy. "Shepard was our friend," said Garrus, hinting at a little nostalgia. "I'd be lying if I said I didn't miss her."

"I miss Shepard too, but…" Tali shook her head before turning her attention back to Kaidan. "You're asking me to leave my work – work that, right now, is very important, - to follow a dream of yours." The quarian hugged herself as though she was cold, but Kaidan had the feeling she was just trying to keep something else at bay. Something like remorse. "I just…"

Whatever Tali was going to say was cut-off by a beep from Kaidan's omni-tool. Hoping it was Maria again, he checked the message immediately.

_Kaidan,_

_You have permission to take the Normandy. The basic crew will accompany you, which includes EDI and Joker. At first, I thought the crew would pose a problem, but when I asked, they said that if they could, they'd go with you._

_I wish I could come with, but it's urgent we figure out the changes that took place in organics. But know that I hope you _do_ find Alys. She… has been dearly missed._

_Good luck,_

_Maria Hackett _

That message brought about one of the biggest sensations of relief Kaidan had ever felt. They had a ship – the very best ship, - at their disposal. Now, all he needed was the support of the people who had counted Alys Shepard as one of their closest friends.

"We have the Normandy," Kaidan informed. He looked at his friends, waiting for a reaction. Garrus's was the first. The turian held Tali by the shoulders and looked into her eyes – as much as he could, anyway, - before speaking. "I want to go."

Tali gave little frustrated jumps. "Garrus, don't put me in this position. You know I have to work and-"

"Don't tell me that there's no part of you that believes Shepard's still alive," the turian said, one of his claws rising up to touch the side of Tali's head. "Please, Tali."

Kaidan was an alien to both Tali and Garrus but he felt even more so when he broke their little moment. "Wherever Shepard is, we're going to need your help, Tali."

The quarian hesitated. True, Shepard was her friend – one of her best friends, in fact, - yet now, she found herself at odds with the situation. There was no one else who Tali had trusted more than Alys Shepard, whom she had followed to hell and back. They had drunk together, been through the worst together, had shared secrets, tales, feelings. Everything that was logic told her Shepard was dead and yet…

When no one else would stand by her side, Shepard had. She had defended Tali in a trial without revealing what her father had done. Shepard… she had done everything for her and now…

Tali let out a long breath. "You're right. I… I'll go. For Alys Shepard."

Her help lifted a burden off of Kaidan's heart. "For Alys Shepard," he echoed.

* * *

><p>Liara and Kaidan took care of all the additional details they needed in order to depart as soon as they could. Together with Tali and Garrus, the four of them went to the still-in-bad-shape space port in London, where the Normandy was waiting. Their old quarters had been given back to them, except for Kaidan's. Since he was the highest ranking officer in the ship, he got… Shepard's old quarters.<p>

To be there again without her brought such a strong ache to his heart that he had to sit down… except that sitting down also brought memories of her, of them. There was no way he was going to be able to sleep here, not until they found Shepard.

With a heavy heart, Kaidan decided to head to the bridge, where Joker was sitting in the pilot's chair and EDI in the co-pilot's. Joker must have heard him approaching, because he turned the chair to face Kaidan.

"Garrus was right," said the flight lieutenant. "You look like hell."

"I know," said Kaidan. "And hopefully, not for long."

"Yeah, I heard. The lead AI expert managed to convince Hackett that Shepard's sending you signals through some sort of connection we all have now."

This surprised Kaidan. Maria adored Shepard, but in one of the messages she had sent, she had implied she wasn't certain about such a connection. Either she was now, or she lied. "She said that?"

"Yup. At least that's how it was explained to me. Anyway, it matches what happened when the relays exploded."

Joker's sudden appearance in London. The team, hurrying inside the Normandy and flying away just as the relay blew yup. It… had never made much sense to Kaidan, how they'd managed to escape.

"How did you know, Joker? How did you know where we were and when to pick us up before the relay exploded?" Kaidan asked with a frown.

"That was me," said EDI. "I began to pick up a warning signal in a frequency that matched Shepard's. I decoded it and told Jeff to pick up the ground crew and flee."

"Sounds like she was trying to warn us about something," Joker said. "What about, I have no idea. But hey, we'll ask her when we find her."

"When are we leaving?"

Joker gave him a lopsided smile "As soon as we finish this conversation."

"Now, then?" asked a tentative Kaidan.

"Now," confirmed EDI.

She and Joker began to prepare for launch, hitting panels here and there. As the Normandy took flight, Kaidan looked out the cockpit's window. They were getting closer to Shepard. Kaidan could feel it.


	4. III: Waking

_A/N: And now, it begins!  
><em>

* * *

><p><em>III: Waking<em>

Piecing together what they could from Kaidan's dreams Liara and EDI managed to narrow down Shepard's probable location to a certain area of Eden Prime, close to where Javik had been found. Kaidan, Liara, Tali and Garrus would scour the land for signs and, hopefully, find Shepard.

As they reached the road Kaidan saw so often in his dreams, they split up. Liara went down the road, Garrus went up and Kaidan and Tali went into opposite ends of the forest surrounding it. Kaidan trekked down a path by a small stream, his feet sending rocks rolling down the small hill.

Kaidan had hoped the vegetation would be less dense when he reached the bottom, but his hopes were misplaced. The trees were close together and millions of vines blocked his view. Kaidan took a step forward, but as he lifted his foot off the ground, he heard a bang and something grazed his ear with a cutting sound.

A bullet. Someone was shooting at him.

Taking cover behind a tree, the human biotic carefully examined his surroundings, taking special care of the zone where the shot had come from. Kaidan put a barrier around himself and moved forward, through the many hanging vines…

And found himself face-to-face with a collector.

Kaidan moved fast. His arm glowed with blue energy as he used his biotics to send the collector flying backwards. The collector hit a tree and before it could scramble to its feet, Kaidan raised his pistol and shot until the collector wouldn't get up anymore.

The human biotic examined the body of his fallen foe. Breathing heavily, he lifted his hand to his ear.

"I was shot at by a collector," Kaidan breathed into the channel.

"A collector?" Liara said, disbelieving. "Why would a collector be here?"

"From experience, a collector is never alone," Garrus stated. "If you saw only one, it likely was a scout."

"You think they're guarding something?" asked Tali.

"Likely," Garrus responded. "We'll come to you, Kaidan."

"Roger that. I'm sending you three my coordinates," Kaidan informed. "I'll be waiting for you here."

Liara was the first to arrive, then Garrus and finally, Tali. The four of them surrounded the body of the collector. Garrus clicked on his visor a couple of times. "His tracks are still fresh. We can follow them."

The group went forward. They walked and walked for at least a couple of kilometers until Kaidan raised his hand to bring them to a halt. "Two collectors at eleven o'clock," he whispered. "Garrus."

"I'm taking care of it." The turian moved further ahead and ducked behind a large trunk. He positioned his Black Widow against his right shoulder and took a moment to aim. He shot and a collector fell. Before the other had any time to react, Garrus shot again, sending the second collector to the ground, dead.

Garrus inspected the entrance the collectors had been guarding, the other three following suit. "Such a remote place… That it's guarded can only mean one thing."

"Whatever's inside is valuable," Liara completed.

"To top things off, the door's locked," Tali mentioned. "I'm bypassing security, but you three better be ready to shoot when it opens." She planed her hand against the door's lock and her omni-tool lit up. Tali's fingers moved with precise swiftness and, in a couple of minutes, the lock turned green. Tali stepped back and allowed Kaidan and Garrus to take the front. Liara punched the door and stepped backwards so that she was behind the men.

The door slip open; the inside was riddled with collectors, some armed, others just appearing to monitor the tanks that covered the walls from the ground to the ceiling. Kaidan just had a moment to register that inside the hundreds and hundreds of pods around them were tiny little babies before he found cover and signaled the others to open fire.

They moved like a cohesive, well-oiled machine. With his Black Widow, Garrus was the first one to bring a collector down. Tali sent her combat drone ahead to draw fire away from them and Liara threw a Singularity towards the bigger collector group, causing them to float and proceeded to shoot them down. Kaidan used Reave on another of their enemies and it only took him a couple of heavy pistol shots to kill it.

Together, it took them little time to annihilate the enemy forces. They had fought together before, but never without Shepard leading them. Kaidan noticed that while effective, they were not the precise, deadly force that they were with her.

As the last collector fell, Garrus scanned their surroundings with his visors. "All clear," he informed.

"Let's go forward," Kaidan ordered.

"How the hell did the collectors manage to populate this facility without anyone noticing?" pondered Tali.

"With all the commotion post-war, it's no wonder no one noticed this," Liara said. "All these babies… I wonder what they're doing here."

"From the set-up, I'd wager they're cloning someone," said Tali. "The question is who."

Kaidan didn't have to think much about it to know the answer. He _knew_ Shepard was here just as he knew that these babies… They were Shepard clones. Hundreds and hundreds of copies of the person he loved the most in the entire universe.

"There are more enemies ahead," Garrus pointed out. "This is really a lot of security for such a remote place."

They made their way further into the building, collectors at almost every turn. Eventually, the group reached what appeared to be the central chamber. It was wide, with a high ceiling, circular in shape and in the middle was a… Kaidan squinted across the distance. Was that a tank?

He approached it, carefully, until he began to discern a human shape curled into a fetal position inside. The moment he recognized her, the entire world seemed to come to a halt.

Inside the tank, connected to dozens of wires, with her hands crossed over her naked breasts was… Shepard.

Kaidan's breath caught in his throat. His sight was a haze and his feet moved on their own accord towards Shepard. With each step he took closer to her, his heart beat faster and faster. His lips moved and he screamed out her name as his hand reached the glass encapsulating her. He banged on the tank once, twice… Eventually, someone reached out for his hand and forced him still.

"Kaidan calm down!" Garrus was screaming at him, a claw fiercely closed around Kaidan's wrist.

"I think I can override the controls," he heard Tali saying. Form the corner of his eye, Kaidan saw the quarian touch the glass for a moment. "We'll get you out of here, Shepard," she tenderly whispered.

Tali moved to the large console by the tank and started juggling with all the controls. Her hands were a rush of electronic proficiency, rivaled only by few in the galaxy. Kaidan looked back at Shepard, his mind urging Tali to hurry her already hurried hands and…

"Do not do that," a children's voice said, pulling Kaidan from his thoughts.

Tali's hands stopped their maddening movements; Garrus lifted his gun; Liara's hands glowed blue; Kaidan spun around, pistol ready. In front of them was what appeared to be a VI with the form of a young boy. Kaidan didn't lower his gun when he asked, "Who are you?"

"I am as old as the Universe itself. I know each and every one of its corners, each and every one of its beings."

"You're not a common VI," Tali pointed out.

"No," said the boy.

"Are you responsible for this?" Kaidan asked, gesturing towards Shepard. "Why do you have her?"

"She sacrificed herself for the good of the Galaxy. As she gave up her essence to forever merge organics and synthetics, her body dematerialized. When that happened, we captured her particles and united them in this tank. She was severely traumatized and so we kept her inside, asleep, while she recovered."

"What about the babies inside all the other tanks?" Liara asked.

"There was no telling if this new life-form wouldn't revolt against me. So, I decided to prepare. I'd create an army made out of copies of the most extraordinary person in the Galaxy: the one who managed to reach us. Should we ever be threatened, I'd unleash it."

"And you were going to leave the original Shepard in that tank?" asked Tali.

"No. She is the original, a quality that is unmatched. She would be the most important piece in my defense."

"So you just brought her back because you wanted to use her," stated Garrus.

"That perception is wrong. Such a person deserved to come out of it alive. That's why I pieced her back together. I gave her life."

Kaidan frowned. "_You_ gave her life? How so?"

"I've said it before. Her body dematerialized-"

"No. Not that." Kaidan shook his head. It was a long shot, but… "What I mean was… Are you God?" Kaidan asked, interrupting the boy in the middle of the sentence.

"I am not God. At least not in the sense most organics regard such a being."

"Meaning?"

"I do not require worshipping. I cannot create organic beings from scratch. Organics are, for all intents and purposes, unaware of me. In fact, the first time I had to take a physical shape was when the woman you call Alys Shepard ascended to the Citadel to put an end to the cycle. So no, I am not God – at least not in the theological sense."

"But you are powerful enough to control all these collectors _and_ to build an army of Shepards," Garrus said, voice filled with suspicion.

"This whole thing stinks to high heaven," Kaidan muttered under his breath. What the boy was saying, the way he had controlled all the collectors and filled this facility with clones… it reminded him a lot of indoctrination. Albeit he still had no idea what had gone on in the Citadel, Kaidan's gut told him this god-child had been involved. "Were you in the Citadel with Shepard?"

"Yes," said the boy. "It was I who gave her three choices: destruction, control or synthesis."

"You _gave _her the choices?" Kaidan croaked.

"I could not control her, as I did the collectors filling this facility. In that moment, the galaxy was in her hands and she chose its fate. She gave the Universe a gift… and so, the Universe gave her a gift back. It gave her life."

"Life in a tank is not life," Liara angrily spat. "You just want to keep her as a pet, as a-"

"It's a small price to pay for her life," said the boy. "Don't you agree?"

Kaidan gritted his teeth. This boy, this… thing, it sought to enslave Shepard in exchange for her life. It had saved her only to use her, it had… Kaidan stopped his thoughts, took in a breath. "No. I don't," he said, his voice as hard as steel. "Get her out, Tali."

The quarian nodded. She wrestled some more with the controls, but eventually, the water slowly drained and Shepard's body was disconnected from the wires.

"No, you can't do that!" the VI boy screamed. For the first time since it had appeared, Kaidan noticed it looked visibly desperate.

"Watch me," Kaidan hissed, stepping back towards the tank, towards Shepard.

"No, no-"

The tank's lid opened with a whooshing sound, silencing the boy. Kaidan immediately put his one of his hands on Shepard's forehead before bending down to check if she was breathing.

"Is she…" Liara began. She had shed her coat and was handing it to Kaidan.

"She's alive," Kaidan finished, taking the coat from the asari. He allowed himself a moment to cradle her face and cursed his greaves for standing between his skin and hers. He pressed his forehead against hers and whispered her name, her whole name. Then, he covered Shepard, wound an arm around Shepard's shoulders and the other under her knees and lifted her up.

"Pull the plug on all the tanks, Tali," he commanded.

"Are you sure?" asked the quarian, visibly shaken by what he had just asked.

"Yes. Whatever that thing was, we cannot leave him with an army to raise," he said. "Pull the plug."

Slowly, Tali nodded. The VI boy screamed, scared and begged them not to do it. As Tali's fingers moved nimbly to execute Kaidan's orders, the human biotic looked down at the sleeping woman in his arms. She was alive, she was here… He wanted nothing more than to hold her forever, but they had to get her back to the Normandy so she could be checked by Doctor Chakwas as soon as possible.

They walked away, the boy's screams filling the room behind them.

* * *

><p>Hours afterwards, Kaidan, Liara, Garrus and Tali were sitting outside the medbay, waiting for news. It had been – and still was, - an agonizingly slow wait. When the door to the medbay opened, Kaidan's head immediately lifted from the table.<p>

"She's awake," Chakwas said. "However-"

Kaidan didn't even hear what else she had to say. He ran to the medbay, cursing the seconds it took for the door to open. When it did and he saw her lying down on the bed, he still couldn't believe she was there.

Shepard looked at him, startled. Her eyes, those beautiful dark blue eyes were wide open, staring back at him. A smile began to shape Kaidan's lips and he began to step towards her. His heart was fluttering and all he wanted was to touch her so that he would finally know this wasn't a dream...

Kaidan would have done that. There was nothing he wanted more. But when Shepard opened her mouth, her words caused him to stop dead in his tracks and his heart to fall to the floor.

"Who are you?"


	5. IV: Confessions

_A/N: I was going to put Kaidan and Liara in this chapter as well, but I've been working on my original novel, _Sightless, _and wanted to update while I had the time. So yeah, Kaidan and Liara the next chapter! _

* * *

><p><em>IV: Confessions<em>

"Kaidan-" the asari's words died on her throat when she laid eyes on her. A quarian and a turian followed the asari into the medbay and they, too, fell silent upon entering.

Alys had just woken up from what felt a very long sleep; her whole body was slow from inactivity and her eyes hurt from the strong lights in the room. But the sensation which was completely overwhelming her was confusion. Who were all these people? And why did she have the feeling that she knew them?

Her eyes met the man's – Kaidan, the asari had called him, - and a strong emotion she couldn't identify surged within her. She blinked slowly once, twice. "Who are you?" she repeated.

The asari took a step forward. "We're your friends, Shepard. You really don't remember us?"

Alys felt ashamed, all of a sudden. She was supposed to know these people. She could see it in their eyes. But her memories were a haze and she couldn't really remember their faces. Looking down, she whispered "No."

The asari looked heartbroken and Alys couldn't think of anything else to say. She twined and intertwined her fingers over and over again, wishing this situation to be over. Much to her luck, the doctor who she had talked to when she had woken up – Doctor Chakwas, the older woman had said, - came into the room. "All right, the four of you have to go. I'll meet you outside in a moment."

Reluctantly, the three aliens obeyed. Alys noticed the human male wasn't budging, though. She looked at him and they held each other's gaze for a while. When he left, Shepard felt her heart constricting, complaining and she didn't know why.

"When's your last memory from?" Chakwas asked when they were alone.

Alys frowned. She had clearly lost a good chunk of her memories and the ones that still remained were all foggy. "I think… When Captain Anderson recruited me into his crew and took me to the Normandy's shakedown run." She looked at the doctor. "Who were those people who came to see me, doctor?"

"Your friends," said Chakwas. "You really can't remember them?"

Alys shook her head in a manner that bordered on guilty. "No, I… like I said, my last memory is of when I joined the Normandy. Out of those four, the only person who was vaguely familiar was the human male."

"Major Kaidan Alenko. He," Chakwas quickly bit down her lip and Shepard had the feeling the doctor had just avoided telling her something. "He was part of the Normandy crew."

"And the others?"

"The turian is Garrus, the quarian's Tali and the asari is Liara. They all joined the Normandy a short while after you began hunting down Saren." Alys must've made a face, because Chakwas stopped. "You don't remember that as well."

It wasn't a question but Alys answered it anyway. "No."

Doctor Chakwas looked down at her pad and made some annotations. "This is going to be complicated. All right, Shepard, I'll be right back."

Once outside the room, Chakwas found herself amidst Kaidan, Liara, Tali and Garrus, all their eyes intent on her, waiting for her to speak. "Shepard's experiencing a form of retrograde amnesia which was likely caused by the trauma suffered when she did whatever had to be done for the Synthesis could take place," Dr. Chakwas said. "Memories are… complicated things and there is no proper cure for amnesia."

"But some people recover their memories," Kaidan stated.

"The only way she can gain back her memories is through spontaneous recovery, which has never been truly understood or explained. I recommend, however, that you visit Shepard regularly and tell her of past events. It's highly doubtful but maybe if we show her key elements from these past few years it'll stir her memories."

"So what should we do?" asked Kaidan.

"Tell her things. Sometimes, it triggers something and has people remember. If that doesn't work, we'll wait. I'll keep you posted in the meantime," said the Doctor. "If you want, you can visit her tomorrow."

"Thanks, Doc," Kaidan said. "We will."

Chakwas gave him a sympathetic smile before leaving. Kaidan's eyes fell back on Liara, who seemed to be in deep thought. "Liara?"

She stared at him, a pensive hand on her chin. "It's… It's speculated that we have inherited the protheans' sensory ability…" Liara looked up at the ceiling, then back down again. "If only we knew how to harness it…"

"But we don't and Javik is missing. Traditional methods are our best hope of helping Shepard regain her memories," Tali said.

"So…" Garrus's voice trailed away for a moment as he readied himself to ask the one question they seemed to be avoiding. "Who should go in first?"

"It…" Kaidan breathed in. "It shouldn't be me; at least not alone."

Liara placed a hand on the human's shoulder. "It must be terribly painful for you, that she doesn't remember."

"It could be worse. She could be dead," Kaidan said with a failed attempt at a smile. "Anyway, I don't think Shepard needs to know we were together, at least not yet. It'd just confuse her even more."

Inside her helmet, Tali couldn't help the sad smile from forming on her lips. She remembered when Shepard had walked in on her and Garrus and how she had smiled when she had said she was happy for both of them. Shepard was the sort of person who deserved to find love, and there was no doubt she had found that with Kaidan. That she had lost it… "Why would that god-child erase her memories anyway?"

"The boy said she would be the most important piece in its defense," Liara pointed out. "It's likely that it begun erasing her memories so that she would feel no remorse if she had to fight against those she saved."

"So… tomorrow, who goes in first?" asked Garrus.

"I'll go," Tali offered.

"You sure?"

She had seriously doubted Shepard could have been alive after the war. She had almost opposed Kaidan's search and she felt awful about that. She had almost turned her back on her friend and she would not do so again. She reached for Garrus's claw and squeezed it. He knew she was remorseful of how she'd acted. "I'm sure."

* * *

><p>The next day, Alys was lying down on the medbay when the quarian came in. She sat up and looked at her visitor, trying to remember what Dr. Chakwas had told her. "Tali… right?"<p>

"Yes," the quarian said. "I'm happy to see you're doing fine."

Alys shrugged. "As fine as I can, I suppose. I still cannot get up from this bed without help."

"Your muscles must have atrophied after so much time on the tank," Tali said. "It's… natural."

Alys sensed an uneasiness emanating from the quarian. "What's wrong?"

"It's just…" Tali shifted uncomfortably in her position. "You were a good friend, Shepard – and to think I almost turned down the chance to find you, it's tearing me apart."

"I'm sorry, I…" Alys was at a loss for words. "I don't know what to say."

"You don't have to say anything," Tali whispered. "Doctor Chakwas told us that re-telling you past events would probably help, so…" Tali paused for a moment. "We were friends, Shepard. You helped me when no one else would and when I needed you the most, you were always there, by my side. You gave me what I needed to finish my pilgrimage. When my father's ships went silent, you went with me to see what was wrong and when we returned to the flotilla, you defended me against exile. Your words alone stopped the admiralty board from exiling me. It was one of the most passionate, truthful speeches I've heard, Shepard. You…" Tali's voice shook. "You gave me a future."

Alys was silent throughout Tali's monologue. She felt it, the friendship the quarian spoke about, but she didn't remember anything she was saying.

"I remember when you gave us back our planet," Tali spoke softly, then. "I was so happy, so ecstatic. You were there beside me, Shepard, when I took off my mask and it was the first time you saw my face. You…" the quarian's voice began to waver. "You said I was the most beautiful thing you'd ever seen. So, if it helps you remember…" Tali reached for the clasps that held her helmet in place; they clicked, and the mask fell into her hands. "I'm here for you, Shepard."

Shepard's eyes were wide. Tali's skin had a purple hue to it, but only a slight one and its complexion was flawless. Wisps of dark hair framed her oval face. She had big eyes, eyes that had a glow to them, a very straight nose and very generous lips. Shepard reached out and touched the quarian's cheek. "You really are beautiful," she whispered, slightly in awe. Her head began to hurt and Shepard slammed her eyes shut. To her came the image of rubble and the smell of machine oil.

"I…" Shepard's voice trailed away. She tried to urge her brain to give her more, but it was silent. "I'm sorry, Tali. I only remember this arid wasteland and the smell of oil."

Tali held her hand for a moment; she then brushed it away and put her mask back on. Alys had the feeling that the quarian was disappointed. "It is… strange, that despite the synthesis, I still cannot get out of my enviro-suit."

"Synthesis?" Alys asked.

"Oh, right… you don't remember that either. You did something while in the Citadel, Shepard, something that made us more like machines and machines more like us. We're… hybrids now."

"All of us?"

"All of us," confirmed Tali. "From where I stand, you gave us a gift, Shepard. You united a galaxy that was completely in pieces. Then, you gave us the Synthesis. You made all of us better."

"I wish I could remember," Alys whispered. "All the things you're telling me… I wish I could remember them."

"You don't realize it yet, but you've lost a lot, Shepard, and it saddens me." Tali placed a hand over hers. "Whatever you need, I'll be there for you… Just like you were there more than once for me."

* * *

><p>The turian, Garrus, came later that day, a package in his hand. He seemed to be a bit shy as he extended Shepard the box.<p>

"You've brought me a present?" Alys asked.

"See for yourself," he said.

Alys took the wrapped package from the turian's hands and tore the paper out. She felt giddy when she noticed it was a sniper rifle. She had always been particularly good with sniper rifles.

"It's an M98-Widow," Garrus explained. "An older model you discarded after you got the upgrade. It was your favorite gun."

Alys opened the box and examined the compacted form of the Widow. Even though she had never seen this sniper rifle before, when she took it out she instantly knew, through some sort of buried instinct, which button to press in that specific gun in order for the it to expand to its full size. "It's beautiful," she said, her eyes sparkling. "Thank you, Garrus."

"I thought you'd like it. It's not your old one, but…" He sighed. "Anyway, I thought it might stir some memories."

Alys tested the gun against her shoulder and looked through the scope. Her right index finger tentatively caressed the trigger. "I don't remember ever holding one of these, but… It feels so familiar."

"Some people claimed that the Alliance's Black Widow was a better option that the Widow. You would argue with them for hours." Shepard detected a hint of amusement in Garrus's voice. "You said the Black Widow didn't have enough power for you, despite holding three shots before needing to reload."

"Sounds like me," said Alys. "I always did like my guns powerful."

"You were a terribly dangerous shot, Shepard," Garrus said, a tiny compliment filling his tone. "The most dangerous one in the entire galaxy."

"So said my academy instructors," Alys said. "It was one of them – and Maria, - who convinced me to go for Infiltration."

"Maria," Garrus said. "She actually got us the Normandy so we could find you."

"She would do that. She's a very loyal friend."

"As are we," Garrus said, but then quickly added, "Even though you don't remember it."

Alys sighed. "I believe you are. Why else would you be bothering with a bed-ridden, amnesiac me if you were not loyal friends? Also…" She rubbed her chest. "I have all these feelings when it comes to you and Tali. I know I'm supposed to trust you, I just… I just don't know why and it's very confusing."

"Don't be like that, Shepard," Garrus said, almost apologetically. "Let's go back to guns, shall we?"

He sensed she was upset, Alys realized, and wanted to change the subject. Whatever form of friendship they'd had, she was glad for it. "I'd love that."

"You and guns, Shepard… I once took you to the top of the Presidum so we could do a shooting contest." There was a slight amusement in Garrus's voice. "Some admire the way you have with people and I get that. You have this… charm when you talk – people will shut up in order to listen to you. But what I've always admired the most about you is the way you handle a sniper rifle." He laughed. "Seriously, Shepard, the way you touched it, it's almost as though you were having a love affair with the gun."

Shepard hugged the Widow, pouting. She felt at ease with this turian, she really did. "I'm not _that_ much of a gun-nut."

"I'm sorry to disappoint, but yes, you are," Garrus said. "We'd even have contests to see who could dismantle, clean and put back together a sniper rifle."

"Who won?"

"It depended, actually. We had a score board and everything."

"Oh God." Shepard took a dismayed hand to her forehead. "I can't believe I kept a score board over who would disassemble, clean and put back together a sniper rifle with a turian."

"You don't."

"Eh. I kind of do," Alys finally admitted. She looked down at her gun, then back at Garrus. "Care to teach me how this one is dismantled? I don't want to ruin it."

"Yeah, sure. First, you press this button here…"

Their little gun demonstration went on for some time and Alys was mildly surprised that she was having fun. Garrus really did know her taste for guns and it showed. No wonder they had been friends. She tried to recall some of her time with Garrus, tried to associate what they're doing now with the similar things they'd done in the past… But all she could remember after Garrus's first demonstration was how to open the Widow, clean it, and put it back together. _That_ particular memory came back to her in a second.

"Shepard?" Dr. Chakwas called. "It's time for your physical therapy."

"That's my cue to leave then," said Garrus. "Stay safe, Shepard."

"You too," Alys said.

"Catching up with old friends?" Chakwas asked when Garrus had left the room.

"Yeah…" Shepard sighed. "Old friends."


End file.
